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As it turns out after I took my exam, I felt a huge weight lifted off of my shoulders. I honestly hadn't realized how concerned I was with that one silly test until it was done. I got to leave school early Thursday, and took Friday off as well. I needed some time to clear my head.
From having no time to myself lately, I've realized how nice it is just to relax. Even though I am a self proclaimed procrastinator, I've been trying to schedule out my time more efficiently so I'm getting at least 8 hours of sleep. It has also given me some perspective about grades and school in general. I've realized that when 11pm rolls around, studying another hour for one quiz won't make a difference. In the long run it is just one quiz, test, project etc. Sometimes the work doesn't get done. It happens, accept it. I have, and I find I'm not as stressed and can actually think much more clearly when I'm taking any type of assessment. Going into a test with a clear head, I remember more of the information and have much more confidence that I can be successful. I enjoy doing well, but school is not the thing that defines who I am.
So, on my AP test I think I did fine, but even if I didn't I've made my peace with that too. It's one test, 70 questions, and a few essay responses. Failing does't make me a bad student, and passing doesn't make me exceptional. I'm satisfied with how I did in the class this year and felt prepared for my test, and that's all I can ask of myself. Looking back, I wish I could have told myself this as I anxiously prepared. As my mom has told me time and time again, hindsight is 20/20.
xoxo,
Julianna
Preppy by the Sea
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